Posted on 09/30/2021
Executive skills have little to do with business executives; instead, these skills are ones that our kids need for daily life, regardless of the career paths they decide to pursue. Think of them as skills that allow a person to effectively "execute" or carry out tasks - both those tasks that they desire and those that are required of them. In part 2 of this series, we briefly listed the specific skills that fall into this category, but today we're going to look at some of them in a little greater detail along with ways a child of various ages would demonstrate mastery of that skill. If your child struggles with the skill, you can consider that a sign that they are weak in that area and look up ways to help them grow in that particular area. In all likelihood, you'll be uncovering the fact that, like your children, you and your partner have strengths and weaknesses in various categories.
Executive Skill 1: Response Inhibition
How many times have you asked your child, "What were you thinking?!" As parents, we usually do this with the assumption that the child was not thinking at all; instead, they were simply responding in a way that they desired. While among other things, this lack of response inhibition is a sign of immaturity, it is also part of a skill set that can be encouraged and honed. Resisting the urge to say or do something requires taking time to think through a situation and the potential effects of various responses.
For a young child, response inhibition can be seen when waiting for a parent's attention, while the parent talks to someone else, without being disruptive. For a teen, it could be seen in calmly responding to a referee's call without arguing or showing anger.
Executive Skill 2: Stress Tolerance
Stress tolerance can be defined as the ability to cope with demands, changes, and uncertainties. Someone who has high stress tolerance can respond well in stressful circumstances. While children may show signs of strength or weakness in this area, it's more of an issue to consider a teen's level of stress tolerance in considering potential career paths.
Executive Skill 3: Emotional Control
We're guessing you're beginning to see some overlap among these executive functions! Emotional control certainly impacts a person's response inhibition and will relate to his or her stress tolerance. Emotional control refers to the ability to manage one's emotions in a way that allows for controlling and directing behavior, achieving goals, and completing tasks. A young child with good emotional control can recover from a disappointment in a short timeframe. A teen who exhibits emotional control will be able to perform well on a test or in a contest, despite anxiety over the outcome.
Executive Skill 4: Flexibility
How does your child respond when new information, a mistake, or some other kind of obstacle requires a change of plans? Flexibility can be demonstrated by the ability to adapt to change. A young child can show flexibility when a park play date is cancelled due to rain, and an indoor picnic is planned in its place. An adolescent might display this skill by applying to another job when the first one, which was thought to be a sure thing, falls through.
Continue reading with Part 5.
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